Phone calls before 8 a.m. are never good news.....This morning was no exception. I won't go into details, but my husband is a pastor and had 3 disturbing phone calls before my feet hit the floor this a.m. I really do love my life and I wouldn't trade it for someone else's, unless they were debt-free, with a house that needs no improving, and children that look like mine, but behave like the ones in old movies that say, "Yes, Fatha, Yes Mum."
But really, being a pastor's wife isn't all that bad. Some days, I don't really know what the true definition is, but I just keep trying to surrender to Christ. I fail, most days. I mean, come on, I have 3 children under the age of seven. I'm lucky to get a bra fastened before lunch! Who knew, in 1998, when I said, "I Do," what I was saying I do to!
Today it was saying "I do" to my 2 daughters who were fighting madly over our single solitary pink marker! "I do mean it when I say neither of you can have it if you're going to fight over it!"
I do love my life. It's a challenging, but very rewarding life. I just have one request. Please don't look at me any different than any other mom. I know that my kids are "supposed" to be the kids that don't talk back and can spout off all kinds of bible verses upon request, but that's not real life. That's an expectation. I struggle with the same frustrations as other moms. How do I deal with it? Not so well, sometimes. I get ticked off and sometimes I even spew words that I can't say at church. I love Jesus and I know He has saved me. The only thing that seperates us is what our husbands do for a living. God has been so good to us, but sometimes I feel pastors and their wives are cast in a very rose-colored light that just doesn't give a realistic view. Like I have said, I wouldn't want to be any where else, but in the center of God's will. That being said, if I can be any more candid, I just want people to see me for me. I'm not perfect nor is my husband. He is a teacher of the word and will be held accountable by God for that, but besides that, he and I are sinners saved by grace.
I hope my rambling didn't come across as "Oh, poor me," but instead as an open view into the life of a pastor's family......
I just love real people.....it's a little long, but worth the watch:
10 comments:
That brought tears to my eyes. Can only imagine what prompted your post...I love you, Melissa...and I am so thankful that you are a real person.
Hi Melissa, this is Emily's friend Jenette. Enjoyed reading your blog and totally emphathize with you! I too am a pastor's wife, and have had calls in the middle of the night and early mornings. Thanks for the encouraging blog.
Well said. I have always loved that "open book" quality about you. What you see is what you get with you, no pretenses. We should all learn from that! I am proud to call you my daughter.Love, Mom
hey, how did you get that "okay now, be nice...." above the comment box?
i was going to comment something funny, but then read all the serious, heartfelt comments, and decided to comment something funny anyway....
"I love Jesus, but I drink a little."
Read it twice now today and watched the video. Wow, Melissa you really laid it all out there didn't you? Good for you. What's real life anyway...it's all shadows and dim mirrors of what'll be changed into Glory and Grace. God bless ya sister friend.
Is it too late to second Robin's funny comment?
Hey Melissa,
I love that you can say things so diplomatically. I can't even imagine how hard it is to be a pastor's wife. Your life is under constant scrutiny by any and all and it doesn't matter that you are just a sinner saved by grace.
I am so glad that you are who you are and I love you very much. I see my mom (a pastor's wife) and she is such a Godly woman. I know that it has taken her years to get that way, but she is always sweet and kind and gentle with all who pass her way and then I think "my poor mother, saddled with a daughter who just has no tact whatsoever". I hope that the years have mellowed me out some, but I'm not sure how much.
Just keep plugging and loving the the Lord and all will be well.
NO! And I scream that in a good way. I mean...you have to know this. My ladies Sunday School class TOTALLY watched this, just this past Sunday. FOR REAL! And we all sat there, snotting and bawling and feeling such conviction. The one that got me most was the mother whose cardboard testimony revealed her son had committed suicide. 'Cause my best friend's brother killed himself 6 1/2 years ago and to this day it still haunts me. But God has used it for His glory, which I just so love.
So anyway, I'm reading this post and thinking, "Good, good stuff," and then I got to the video and squealed. But I can't watch it again...I can't cry tonight.
That video gave me chills. Very powerful.
I can only imagine how frustraing it can be to be the "Pator's Wife", so many expetations to live up to. I feel it even on my own blog. I find myself thinking "Ohhh...this might offend those conservative Christians..." I have to remind myself that we're all people and entertained by similar experiences.
Loved your post!
It's nice to know that other people are real too. I catch a lot of grief at times at church but I think the only difference between me and them is that I don't pretend. So good for you for not pretending. What is the point in that anyway? It accomplishes what?
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